When different people meet, they all have different motives. Some are looking for potential lifetime partners, some for a short-term date to an event (i.e. reunion, wedding), and others just want to have fun. Whatever the motive is, wouldn’t you like it if there was a pre-dating transparency?

What is Pre-Dating Transparency

The concept of pre-dating transparency is basically telling the other person where you are in life right now and what you are expecting from dating. For example, you could just be looking for a friend to confide in. Or, you may be on the lookout for a long-term relationship. Whatever it is that you want to define your relationship wants before you start dating the person. This is what pre-dating transparency is all about.

The Pros

The nice thing about pre-dating transparency is knowing exactly where you stand. For example, you like this person that you just met. You want to get to know him or her more. With pre-dating transparency, you both get to tell each other what you are expecting. It eliminates guessing and, eventually, stress from not knowing where the relationship is going.

And if the two of you do not share the same goal in dating, then you have the option to stop right away so that you do not waste time and resources. This means you can easily move on to the next prospect who has the same dating goals as you. 

The Cons

The downside, however, is that you may easily give up finding a person with the same wants as you. Your date might be interested in you, and he or she may be the soulmate that you have been waiting for. But, when you tell this person that you are not looking into a serious relationship right now, he or she might likely back out. In this case, you might miss your chance. 

Wisdom to Know the Difference

So in the matter of pre-dating transparency, it would still be good to exercise caution. Maybe, by the first or second meeting, you can already gauge the situation if you decide that you want to be honest about your expectations. Is he or she someone who’s ready for commitment or just a fling? For other tips on dating, read other posts on our blog.

You know that you are a romantic person. A lot of your friends tell you so, but how come you’re not in a relationship yet? It’s probably because you are what’s called a “lithromantic” and you don’t even know it.

Everything You Need To Know About Being A Lithromantic

Basically, a lithromantic is someone who falls in love but only in theory. This kind of people love to be in love but don’t necessarily want to be in a relationship. It’s ironic, isn’t it? They can be head over heels crushing over somebody but, as soon as their crush reciprocates the feeling, they head for the hills.

How Can You Tell If You Are A Lithromantic?

There are a few reasons why lithromantics are this way. One could be because they feel like being too close with somebody will end in heartbreak. Two: it’s possible that they don’t want the perfect illusion of the person they’re interested in to be shattered. Now, how would you know if you are this kind of person or not?

1. You don’t need to be in a romantic relationship. You are in love with a certain person, but you cannot bring yourself to become a partner in a relationship.

2. You are emotionally unavailable. It maybe that you just had a traumatic experience. But, whatever the reason is, you just can’t seem to open your heart to another person.

3. You prefer platonic relationships. As much as you can, you prefer connections that are platonic. You are okay with just being friends.

4. You don’t like physical touch. It seems that physical touch, and generally more intimacy, makes your stomach queasy. It may be that you have not experienced affection when you were younger or probably a victim of a bad experience.

5. You have an attraction towards fictional characters. Another sign of being a lithromantic? You are more in love with superheroes or characters in movies than a real person. It must be because you already know the parameters of how they operate.

6. Your crushes are a secret. You have never told a soul about your crushes. You just don’t want to talk about them to other people.

Actually, there is nothing wrong with being a lithromantic. Don’t force yourself into a relationship just because others are pressuring you. Eventually, you may find love and venture into a romantic relationship when you are ready. If not, just enjoy being single, unattached, and being happy with that feeling of being in love. For more updates and tips, read other posts on our blog.

We encounter so many dating tips on the internet that we sometimes get too focused on qualities in a partner that can make us feel safe and secure. Things like power, money, and influence may be important to some, but it’s the moments of micro-attraction that are the most important.

Why Micro-Attraction Is Important For Long-Term Relationships

In our world that looks up and admires only the biggest and the most, we sometimes forget that it’s the little things that matter in the long run. To understand micro-attraction better, read the following:

Small Moments With Giant Consequences

Micro-attraction can be found in small moments, like a casual mention of what you like and your partner gets it or does it for you. These little actions have big impacts on our lives – as well as on our hearts and minds.

Gearing Up For The Long-Term

When our partner does a simple random but thoughtful task, like make your bed or help an old person cross the street, you will realize that these little things are what you would like to see or experience every day for the rest of your life. While looks and flashy cars might give you a sense of entitlement and pride at the moment, how long with that feeling last?

The Unseen Matters

It takes some time spent with the other person before you realize these moments of micro-attraction. That is because these moments are beyond superficial. You will get to realize the unseen qualities of the other person, such as having a good character, kindness, integrity, and even empathy. These are the qualities that you would want your lifetime mate to have.

You Start To Value Your Growth

When you are with another person who stirs up your feelings because of the micro-attraction, you start to value your individualism as well as your own personal growth. You also subconsciously desire to become a better person, to do more, and to invest more in the relationship. You see how doing good can affect you and you know that if you give out goodness to your partner, you will certainly reap rewards in your relationship.

You need to watch out for these moments of micro-attraction when gauging a potential partner or your current relationship. These may be your ticket to a gratifying and long-term relationship. Or, even marriage. For more tips on relationships, read other posts on our blog.

Ideally, we all want to be in a relationship that’s supportive – one partner supports the other and vice versa. However, not all couples have this goal. There’s a type of relationship where one person makes it his or her mission to make the other person better. This person has, what’s called, the savior complex.

Signs that Say You Have The Savior Complex

The mission may not sound as bad because we do want our partner to be better. We are in a relationship to grow together and become our best versions of ourselves – isn’t that one of the major points of being together? Yes, but there’s more to it.

Supportive Partner VS The Savior Complex

When you are supportive, you help your partner change for the better, but you don’t want to change the entire person so he or she can fit into your idea of “the perfect partner”. That’s one of the main signs of the savior complex – you correct. This is something totally different from being supportive.

Always Interjecting

One of the hallmarks of a healthy relationship is when two people are actively listening to each other. If your partner says how he or she feels, and you listen but you interject after every two minutes, it’s a sign that you want your opinion to become your partner’s.

Interrogative

When we look for a partner, we look for someone we can have long conversations with like how we have conversations with our friends but deeper. A person with the savior complex does have these long conversations, but it’s focused more on interrogating his or her partner to find the “root cause” of his or her flaws.

Helping Too Much

Bringing your partner lunch or dinner when he or she has a busy day at work is fine. It’s very helpful since your significant other may not have a lot of time. But, if you do small as well as grand gestures even if your partner did not ask for them (he or she may not even need any help), you may have the savior complex.

It’s always a good thing to help your partner become a better person. However, we shouldn’t change the person based on what we think is ideal. For more relationship, as well as online dating, tips, read other posts on our blog.