When it comes to dating – as with many things in life – there are no guarantees of success. You may think you’ve got everything covered:  from picking a great, cozy restaurant and being dressed up to the nines, to showing your most polite and gentlemanly behavior, but then you never hear back from her. If you can’t figure out why, this first date mistake may be the answer.

A Common First Date Mistake That Puts People Off

If you thought the date went swimmingly and can’t put your finger on the reason she’s practically gone AWOL ever since, it may be due to reasons that have nothing to do with you (like her discovering she’s not over her ex, or realizing she’s not ready for a relationship), or due to this one very common first date mistake you’ve made: being negative.

Sometimes, in our effort to make conversation we may comment on something like the traffic we found on the way to the restaurant or the nasty weather, without realizing we sound whiny. Also, your ability to make sarcastic jokes may make you popular among friends, but when you’re in the presence of a lady you know nothing about, it is best to keep your jokes a little milder to avoid offense.

Moreover, despite the fact that honesty is considered to be an asset, revealing your weaknesses too soon can actually prove to be a major turnoff. People often think that by willingly showing their own shortcomings right off the bat, they win points for honesty and prevent bad surprises later. However, there is a mistake in this logic, as people tend to fear that a person who is supposed to show their best sides on a date will actually have a lot more issues than he lets on.

A Date Is Not A Therapy Session

This huge first date mistake is based on the wrong notion of what a date is. A date should not be mistaken for a therapy session. The lady sitting across the table is not a therapist – even if she is, she is off duty, she is there to have a good time. The aim of the date is not for one of the two people to let off steam and feel better, it is supposed to be a fun, exciting experience where both parties get to know each other better.

Don’t burden your date with your problems, don’t show her your red flags and don’t expect her to be tuned to your sarcastic sense of humor instantly. Instead, keep the conversation light and interesting, focus on the positive experiences of the day, talk about the good things you notice around you, and try to show your best self – she can discover your flaws in the dates that follow if you do all of the above.

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No one gets married planning to cheat on their partner, or even thinking they will be cheated on. We hear about it happening all around us, though, so we know it’s a possibility we can’t rule out completely. There are, however, things we can do in order to avoid an affair that would put a spanner in the works of our plans for marital bliss.

The Best Way To Avoid An Affair That Would Blow Up Your Marriage

The figures given by the Statistic Brain Research Institute show that one or both spouses admit to either physical or emotional infidelity in 41% of marriages; with a whopping  57% of men and over half (51%) of women admitting to infidelity in any of their relationships. These figures are hardly reason for complacency, but they shouldn’t put you off marriage either.

The way most of us deal with the fear of being cheated on is to sternly warn our partner that infidelity is out of bounds in our marriage, and letting him/her know that the minute we catch wind that they have done the deed, we’re gone for good. Even though it might seem like the only way to discourage our partners from having an affair, in reality, what this straightforward approach does is to make them want to cover their tracks so we never learn about their affair.

Understanding Why People Have Affairs

What we need to understand, then, is why men and women may cheat. Only then can we work on eliminating, or at least reducing these causes. As concerns men, it has been found that the main reason a guy will stray is for casual sex. If a man is not 100% satisfied with his sex life at home, he is likely to look for what he wants in an affair. For women, on the other hand, it seems that the number one reason for infidelity is feeling emotionally neglected or unwanted. In other words, women might seek comfort and admiration in the arms of a lover if they feel scorned within their marriage.

So, What Can You Do To Avoid An Affair In A Marriage?

There are 3 main things you can do to prevent the worst from happening.  First of all, you need to be aware of your partner’s needs and desires. This can only be achieved through constant and open communication. It is the main reason why two spouses need to first and foremost be good friends with each other, they need to feel free to express their true self and not be ashamed to communicate their needs and wants for fear of being criticized.

Second, as a marriage progresses, so do the people involved in it. What was once desirable, may not be so anymore, but there will be core things your spouse admired in you that he/she still finds irresistible.  For example, if it’s her long hair you love, let her know so she can keep it this way; if she admires your cooking skills, don’t stop making her favorite dish. In other words, evolve but also stay true to the things that brought you together.

A third way to avoid an affair ruining your marriage is to be sincere enough to discuss temptation with each other. Do you find Beyonce stunning? Does she think Alexander Skarsgaard is God’s gift to women? So what? Make it OK to talk about the people you find attractive like two adults who are neither blind nor asexual, knowing you are committed, you are making the conscious decision to remain faithful to each other.

To cut a long story short, you can’t put your marriage in bubble-wrap and be safe in the knowledge it will never break. But, you can avoid an affair breaking it if you make sure you handle it with love and care every single day.

Let’s be honest, dating can be as much fun as it can be a total nightmare. And if you have bad dating habits, it can be hard as hell to break the cycle of lousy decisions. Luckily, it can be done, and some men have managed to turn their disastrous behavior around.

How Can Bad Dating Habits Be Turned Around

From being driven only by sex to being incredibly picky, some men used to sabotage their own personal happiness. This is how they turned their life around.

The Guy Who Thought It Was All About Sex

This was someone who only cared about the number of ladies he’d slept with. His perception of happiness was going home with a different woman every night. He felt that it was sort of achievement that proved how attractive and successful he was. One day, he realized it was not enough to list numbers, he felt alone and empty. This guy decided to change his attitude towards women and became more respectful and choosy. He is now happily engaged, and not missing his days of debauchery at all.

The Career-Driven Guy

You probably meet this type of guy at work. He leaves and breathes for work, his only care being how to climb the career ladder. This guy only dated casually, usually with some co-worker he didn’t even trust with his real worries for fear she’d use the info against him. He got a major raise and a huge office, and then noticed how miserable he was because there was no one to truly share his joy with. He slowed down, made some time for himself and is now seriously looking to meet the woman with whom to share his deepest thoughts and his happiness.

The Guy Who Was Too Picky

From the way his date dressed to the shape of her toes, this was a person who was looking for perfection. He would look and look for flaws, until he found one – even a tiny detail no one else would care about. Then, he’d act grossed out and walk away from the relationship. Someone talked about it with him, and opened up his eyes to the truth: he was a commitment-phobe who had been hurt before. So he ended things before his partner had a chance to leave him first. Today, he is in a blissful, long-term relationship with a woman who may not be perfect, but she’s perfect for him.

The Guy Who Was Too Insecure

His bad dating habits included calling his girlfriend constantly to check on her, not really trusting she was telling him the truth, not allowing her to see her friends and occasionally trying to put her down. Some girl he genuinely loved upped and left him, explaining that he needed to work on himself. And so he did. He attended long counseling sessions where he looked into the real reasons he felt so insecure, managing to raise his self-esteem and accept himself for who he really is. He’s back with his girl, and he’s a different person today.

Bad dating habits can deprive us of happiness and they can cost us the chance to find someone to share our lives with. As with all habits, they may be hard to break, but the first and perhaps most important step is to realize they exist before we figure out a way to get over them.

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No one in the world would disagree that love is a magnificent thing. This is why it’s so ugly when you realize your partner has started to fall out of love with you. You wonder what you might have done wrong, or what the problem may be with her, and if there’s a way to reverse things or it’s too late. Save yourself this pain by learning the things that make a lady’s heart grow cold.

Women Fall Out Of Love Because Of These Things

There’s a wide spectrum of things that can make a woman lose her faith and her interest in a relationship and not want to be with a guy anymore. They may be reasons starting with her own self or be off-putting behaviors of her partner.

#1. Because she feels like she’s lost herself.

Sometimes when we’re in a relationship we focus all our attention on our partner and what makes them happy. This is often to the detriment of our personal satisfaction and happiness and can lead to feelings of resentment and bitterness in the long run.

#2. Because you’re growing apart.

The person you are in your 20s may be worlds apart from who you are in your 30s and forties. So, especially in long-term relationships, there is always a fear of growing up to be different people, with totally different goals, likes, and aspirations.

#3. Because the honeymoon phase is over.

Conversely, if it’s a short-lived relationship we’re talking about, it may just be that the first period of your time together has passed. So, now you’re over the phase where everything seems perfect, she’s starting to see some annoying things about you that she either found cute before or she wasn’t even able to discern.

#4.Because she’s feeling neglected.

As the English proverb goes “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned”. Even if you feel like you’re entitled to pay less attention to your girl because, say, you’re too busy with work commitments, the truth of the matter is that a lady who feels like she’s playing second fiddle in your life is one who will soon lose interest. Make your girl your priority, or she might quickly fall out of love with you.

#5. Because she can’t take any more criticism.

As we become more and more familiar with each other, we might start feeling it’s our right to pass judgment on our partner. But the minute we decide we are entitled to criticize her, we may fall into the trap of doing it as often and whenever we see fit. This is a sure-fire way to make her lose interest in trying to impress you, and then a guaranteed way to make her fall out of love with you as her self-esteem takes constant blows from your harsh words.

It’s true, sometimes we take each other for granted so much that we lose touch with the things that make our partners fall out of love with us. We may even be as deluded as to believe it’s impossible to ever lose our girl. Realizing the aforementioned reasons to fall out of love are legit can make us act differently, though, preventing such a sad outcome and helping us keep our girls (and ourselves) happy.

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